Silicon Investor (SI) -- The First Internet Community

STOCKTALK

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor. We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community. If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: jbe who wrote (35057)	4/17/1999 9:45:00 AM
From: Dayuhan	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 108807

To say that women, or men, essentially seek "dominion" essentially confirms that argument. To say that they seek dominion exclusively, or that the quest for dominion is the primary driving force in their sexual relationships, would support that argument, not (I would think) confirm it. The games we discuss provide the opportunity to experience dominion, or submission, or both, without allowing those conditions to control the entire relationship. Obviously they can get out of hand, as can most things, but in general I think the whole idea rather healthy. Of course I feel that way about most of my assorted kinks, and rationalization doubtless has something to do with it. I wouldn't say that women, or men, seek dominion above all things. I suspect that both are capable of getting a wicked thrill out of it once in a while.

To: jbe who wrote (35057)	4/17/1999 11:48:00 AM
From: Edwarda	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 108807

Joan, I understand quite fully your reservations. A relationship based on power and domination has to give one pause, although it can be loving. In my own life, I have had plenty of reason to be wary of entering into such a relationship. BTW, rape may be the ultimate domination, but it is involuntary submission and has nothing to do with sex as far as I can tell. The domination is merely expressed via sex organs. Yet the kind of role playing to which Steven refers in the post following yours can be intensely sexual and a part of intense loving between equal partners. Under these circumstances, it can be a safe exploration of experience and sensation. The key words are "equal," "loving," and "safe."

To: jbe who wrote (35057)	4/17/1999 1:55:00 PM
From: Chuzzlewit	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 108807

Joan, I think the concept of love is a construct that we use to rationalize genetic and evolutionary determinism. IMO we need to recognize it as rationalization, not an independent physical reality. People engage in sexual activity because it feels good -- like scratching an itch. They tend to stay with a single partner for some period of time for the same reason. So, when you light-heartedly asked Does it really matter what women want, or what men want? They are not likely to get it, anyway...<gg> you raised a very profound question. What each of us desires depends on our individual rationalization of the sex drive, but what the species wants (I hate to be teleological, but I can't help it here) is another matter altogether. The poet in us tends to avoid the question of why love exists at all, but the scientist understands full well that reproduction is a necessary precondition for the survival of the species. We try to convince ourselves in so many ways that we are different from the animals, but in point of fact, except for our insistence that we are different, we are really no different. Unfortunately we have mucked up our reproductive lives with taboos, and rules, and guidebooks that run counter to where our instincts lead. From a biological perspective, sexuality is entirely reproductive in nature, as is monogamy (simply because it has survival value for the offspring). The separation of procreation from recreation inevitably invites some to engage in rewriting the rules; consequently we are dealing with issues that are needlessly complex. This is a long, and drawn out way of saying that I agree with you provided we agree that the concept of love is a distinctly human rationalization of a set of behaviors and instincts. Nevertheless I still enjoy the poetic rationalizations and the sexual fantasies. But like you, what do I know? CTC