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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Edwarda who wrote (35073)4/17/1999 3:08:00 PM
From: jbe  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 108807
 
Edwarda -- Here is a neat concept: "erotic asceticism".

Thank you for validating my memories of chivalric/courtly love. In the meantime, uncertain that I had it right, I ran a net search, and came up with this definition. Not the best, nor the most comprehensive, but I do like that "erotic asceticism" phrase:

Description. The concept and feeling of longing and yearning, experienced somatically, and summarized by the notion of erotic asceticism as a discipline of unfulfilled desire. Grounded in sexual passion, it functions as a kind of mental, even moral, discipline. It entails the simultaneous acceptance of contradictory notions. It echoes the mystical yearning for God, the desire to escape from matter (the physical other) in favour of a spirit (an archetype), emphasizing inner feeling rather than ritual observance of marriage, and favouring sexual abstinence.

In this idealized version of romantic love, the fair lady is seen by the knight as his source of inspiration and as a symbol of beauty and perfection. It is this ideal which leads him to noble acts, to being spiritual, high-minded, refined. The relationship is idealized and spiritualized, there is no sexual involvement. It lifts the couple above the gross, physical level.

Nor is there an intimate relationship as with an ordinary, mortal woman, so the lovers are not married. Indeed the lady is usually married to another. Despite the absence of sexual relations or marriage, the couple have intense and passionate desire for each other. This desire is spiritualized so that each sees the other as a symbol of the divine archetypal world.

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