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Pastimes : WHY?? Littleton Colorado -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Jody Ritchie who wrote (238)	4/25/1999 4:56:00 PM
From: MulhollandDrive	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 368

Jody, You are not talking to yourself, many are reading what you said, in fact, that post should be required reading for everyone. My goodness, I almost don't know where to begin. I know exactly what you are saying, I too have seen first hand the type of uncivilized, cruel behavior that is surely at the core of the Littleton shooters' violent, deadly reaction. Believe it or not one of the things that probably saved you was that at least it would appear from your message that you did not retaliate against the tormentors by joining up with an "alternative" group. You had no re-enforcing supporters of your pain. Thank God you didn't act out your pain in your solitude. Thank God that something inside of you (if nothing more than the concern for others about the impact of your death) stopped you from pulling that trigger. Thank God you were able to get past your traumatic high school encounters far enough to make a positive change in your life and see a reason for living. The most important thing as you so well stated in your message is for parents to get to know their child and don't wait until they are in their late teens already being adversely influenced by our culture, schools, media and peers. Get to know your child when he is YOUNG and make sure that he knows YOU. Make it your business to be sensitive to what is happening in his life and always be a ready resource for him to confide in without fear of condemnation or ridicule or perhaps, most of all, MINIMIZING the very real pain that he has been subjected to. Parents must do whatever they have to do to alleviate this type of abuse and suffering, even if it means self sacrifice, removing the child from the abusive environment, WHATEVER it takes. If we really love our children as we say, this is the very least we can do. I am a parent of 2 grown children, one was the "popular", attractive cheerleader who graduated as valedictorian of her class, the other, my son, experienced much of the same behaviour you suffered in high school. He was (is) a brilliant, artistic, gifted child that did not "fit" in with the "jocks" or the otherwise "accepted" group. I can only tell you that as a parent, I refused to let my son be tormented without doing everything in my power to see it stopped. In his case, it meant taking him out of that particular school. It was not an easy road, because even loving, supportive parents cannot be with their children 24 hours a day and be their protectors. But he, like you became a stronger person because of what he had to endure. The story of child on child cruelty, unfortunately is more the rule, than the exception. The other thing I would say to parents is that if your child is the one who is "the jock", the popular one, the prom kings and queens, the ones with the cool clothes and cars, make sure that you teach those children to show basic human kindness to those that don't "fit in". Teach them the importance of others feelings and fears and to reach out to others and be pro-active in including friends from diverse an different socio-economic backgrounds, who knows, they may actually save a life. bp