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Pastimes : Happy Hour: A thread for not so intelligent discussions -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: MoneyBaggs who wrote (547)	4/27/1999 11:25:00 PM
From: Vision21	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 2380

Would anybody like to go to the ZOO? A Trip To The Zoo It's a beautiful warm day and a man and his wife are at the Zoo. She's wearing a cute loose-fitting, pink spring dress, sleeveless with straps. As they walk through the ape exhibit and pass in front of a very large gorilla, the beast goes crazy. He jumps up on the bars, holding on with one hand and his feet, grunting and pounding his chest with his free hand. The gorilla is obviously excited at the pretty lady in the wavy dress. The husband, noticing the excitement, proposes that his wife tease the poor fellow. The husband suggests she pucker her lips, wiggle her bottom, and play along. She does, and the gorilla gets even more excited, making noises that would wake the dead. Then the husband suggests that she let one of her straps fall. She does, and the gorilla is just about to tear the bars down. "Now try lifting your dress up your thighs." This drives the gorilla absolutely crazy. Suddenly, the husband grabs his wife by the hair, rips open the cage door, slings her in with the gorilla and slams the door shut. "Now, tell HIM you have a headache!"

To: MoneyBaggs who wrote (547)	4/28/1999 7:07:00 PM
From: FREAKAZOID	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 2380

This guy went out to fetch his morning paper..above him in the tree he heard some loud movement and grunting..he looked up to see what it was, and saw an enormous Silver Back Gorilla. He left the paper and hurried inside to call the Zoo to capture the mighty beast. When he told the Zoo about the Gorilla, they said there was nothing they could do, but did give him the number of a professional that could capture the creature with out harming it. He contacted the Gorilla catcher and explained that he did not wish to hurt the animal, the Catcher reassured him that that is his expertise. The Gorilla catcher arrived quickly in his pick-up truck loaded with a giant-sized cage, he stepped out of the truck accompanied by his Rot-weiler and a 12 gauge shot gun. When the owner of the house saw the shot gun he felt uneasy about what was about to happen. The Gorilla catcher casually walked up to the owner of the house handed him the gun and said "hold this" , the owner immediately asked "exactly what is your plan!! and why am I holding a shot gun!!" The Gorilla catcher replied in a slighty hick voice " Easy now son, what I am gonna do, is climb up that there tree and shake the branch BIG BOY is standin on and make him fall down to the ground..then Rex, my Rot, is gonna bite on to his balls, then I am gonna ease the Big Boy into the cage". "Ok sounds good but why the hell do I have to hold this gun?". the owner asked. The Gorilla catcher immediately answered "Just by chance..if I slip and fall out of the tree...I want you to shoot that damn dog!". freak!!