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To: The Philosopher who wrote (2041)4/29/1999 7:03:00 PM
From: Barney  Respond to of 2733
 
There are these 3 kids on the ground and 3 army men in an airplane, the first man on the plane takes a bite out of an apple and says "This apple is bad.", and throws it out the window.

The second man takes a bite out of an orange and says "This orange isn't rype.", and throws it out the window.

The third guy gets a grenade and pulls the clip-----"This is a dud.", and throws it out the window.

On the ground 2 kids are crying and 1 kid is laughing.

The kid thats laughing asks the first kid thats crying and asks "Why yu cryin?"

The crying kid says "An apple fell outa thin air and hit my head"

The kid thats laughing says "K" and asks the second crying kid"Why yu cryin?"

Second kid says "An orange fell outa thin air and hit me on my head."

Both kids that are crying asks the kid thats laughing "Why you LAUGHING?"

And HE says "I just farted and that building blew up."




To: The Philosopher who wrote (2041)4/29/1999 7:09:00 PM
From: Barney  Respond to of 2733
 
Tommy's house is packed with relatives for Christmas dinner. Grandpa calls 6 year old Tommy and starts asking about school, girlfrinds and other stuff he can think of. After a while, grandpa notices that Tommy is loosing interest in the conversation so he pulls out two bills from his wallet to see if he can keep him interested. A ten and a twenty dollar bill. He shows both bills to Tommy and tells him that he can keep any one he chooses. Tommy reaches over and grabs the ten dollar bill.

Grandpa pretty surprised and upset about the unwise decision his grandchild made, pulls out another ten dollar bill to see if it was a mistake. Again, he tells Tommy to take one of the bills and keep it. Tommy grabs the other ten. Grandpa again is surised and upset. He take Tommy over to one of the uncles and shows him how dumb Tommy is in choosing the ten over the twenty. Grandpa goes on and on showing every uncle and cousin and each time Tommy chooses the ten over the twenty. Grandpa finally shows the stunt to daddy.

Daddy's quite surprise but doesn't pay too much attention at the moment. A few hours later, daddy who is very concerned about Tommy's poor decision, walks up to him and asks him if he knows the difference
between a ten dollar bill and a twenty. "Of course" answers Tommy. "So why did you always choose the ten over the twenty" asks dad. Tommy, with a wide smile answers "well dad, if I would have chosen the first twenty dolar bill, do you think grandpa would have played the game fifteen more times?"