To: Chuzzlewit who wrote (5228 ) 5/2/1999 12:58:00 PM From: I Know Nada Respond to of 32932
Chuzzlewit, I was simply trying to explain that to attack SI Admin when you are trying to bring offensive posts to his attention is NOT the way to accomplish your goal. Pmailing him with the link to posts which you feel are violations of the terms of use is the best method to effect a change. People who do violate the terms of use are suspended or kicked off the site, but SI Admin cannot possibly monitor all the threads. Just because you had mentioned this to him in the past and he has not kicked EV off the site does NOT mean that he is ignoring the problem or that he does not personally find his posts to be offensive perhaps. You see, he cannot allow his personal judgements to enter into his position as SI Admin. Until and unless there is a blatant violation of the terms of use, Bob is unable to take action. I would also add that the best tactic, a proven psychological method in fact, to resolve this dilemma would simply be to IGNORE any posts by this individual. This would result in an initial increase in posts but if these posts are ignored as well, typically extinction occurs and he will wander off somewhere else... Though you and many others find EV to be very offensive, you have the choice not to read his posts! It is really very simple. You cannot be enraged or aghast if you choose not to take part in the communication at all. This is a difficult tactic to learn, even for the strongest, most grounded of individuals. Choosing NOT to be party to abuse in any form, sometimes simply by refusing to listen, can be an effective tool for the well-being of the psyche. Of course, you might not stop him from posting at all; however, you will have spared yourself which should ultimately be one's goal. Furthermore, though you might fight against any display of bigotry, racial slurs, or prejudice and it is a valid and noble effort, you must realize that no one can change another. All of your indignation, even justified and well-intentioned, will never effect a change on certain individuals. You must adjust your perceptions and your reactions to such individuals and allow them to show their true colors as they inevitably will. Lastly, I would direct you to this thread. <ggg> Subject 23733 Perhaps you could post this link on the Feelies thread and suggest that EV might find it to be a comfortable and acceptable "home thread". ;) Then, you really ought to just walk away. All of the above, IMO only, and stated respectfully with the best of intentions to assist in the resolution of these unfortunate incidences. -I [actually] Know [something]! ;)