Dear Friends,
It is important for men to remember that as women grow
older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same
quality of housekeeping as they did when they were
younger. When men notice this, they should try not to
yell. Let me relate how I handle the situation.
When I got laid off from my consulting job and took
"early retirement" in April, it became necessary for
Nancy to get a full-time job, both for extra income
and for health benefits that we need. It was shortly
after she started working that I noticed that she was
beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from fishing or hunting about the
same time she gets home from work. Although she knows
how hungry I am, she almost always says that she has
to rest for half an hour or so before she starts
supper. I try not to yell, instead I tell her to take
her time and just wake me when she finally does get
supper on the table.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished
eating. It is now not unusual for them to sit on the
table for several hours after supper. I do what I can
by reminding her several times each evening that they
aren't cleaning themselves. I know she appreciates
this, as it does seem to help her get them done before
she goes to bed.
Now that she is older she seems to get tired so much
more quickly. Our washer and dryer are in the
basement. Sometimes she says she just can't make
another trip down those steps. I don't make a big
issue of this. As long as she finishes up the laundry
the next evening I am willing to overlook it. Not
only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear
to the Monday lodge meeting or to Wednesday's or
Saturday's poker club or to Tuesday's or Thursday's
bowling or something like that, I will tell her to
wait until the next evening to
do the ironing. This gives her little more time to do
some of those odds and ends things like shampooing the
dog, vacuuming or dusting.
Also, if I have had a really good day fishing, this
allows her to gut and scale the fish at a more
leisurely pace. Nancy is starting to complain a little
occasionally. For example, she will say that it is
difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly
bills during her lunch hour. In spite of her
complaining, I continue to try to offer encouragement.
I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three
days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also
remind her that missing lunch completely now and then
wouldn't hurt her any, if you know what I mean.
When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs
more rest periods. She had to take a break when she
was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to
embarrass her when she needs these little extra rest
breaks. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold
glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a
while. I tell her that as long as she is
making one for herself, she may as well make one for
me and take her break by the hammock so she can talk
with me until I fall asleep.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I
support Nancy on a daily basis. I'm not saying that
the ability to show this much consideration is easy.
Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it
impossible.
No one knows better than I do how frustrating women
can become as they get older. However, guys, even if
you just yell at your wife a little less often because
of this article, I will consider that writing it was
worthwhile.
Signed, Bob
Note:
Bob's funeral was on Saturday, January 25th. Nancy
was acquitted Monday, January, 27th. |
