Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke Message Board

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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

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To: Juraj (Yuri) Krajci who wrote (1938)	5/14/1997 7:11:00 AM
From: Kip518	of 62563

The following quotes are taken from actual medical records as dictated by physicians... "By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better." "On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared." "She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night." "The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983." "Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing." "Discharge status: Alive but without permission." "The patient refused an autopsy." "The patient has no past history of suicides." "The patient expired on the floor uneventfully." "The patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days." "She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December." "The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath with a picture of acute pulmonary edema at home while having sex which gradually deteriorated in the emergency room." "The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch." "Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you would like to work her up." "She is numb from her toes down." "While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home." "The skin was moist and dry." "When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room."

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