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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

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From: Doug Coughlan	1/19/2006 9:23:41 AM
	of 62592

DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS: 40-ish..............................49 Adventurous..................Slept with everyone Athletic............................No tits Average looking.................Ugly Beautiful..........................Pathological liar Contagious Smile...............Does a lot of pills Emotionally Secure.............On medication Feminist...........................Fat Free spirit.........................Junkie/Lush Friendship first...................Former slut Fun.................................Annoying New-Age.......................Body hair in the wrong places Old-fashioned....................No BJs on the First Date Open-minded.....................Desperate Outgoing.......................Loud and Embarrassing Passionate........................Sloppy drunk Professional.......................Bitch Voluptuous....................Very Fat Large frame.......................Hugely Fat Wants Soul mate................Stalker WOMEN'S ENGLISH: 1. Yes = No 2. No = Yes 3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry 6. We need to talk = You're in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = You better not 8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron! 10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? MEN'S ENGLISH: 1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy 3. I am tired = I am tired 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! 5. I love you = I really need sex now 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you 11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

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