Four guys were sitting in a bar and they got to talking about what each thought was the fastest thing in the world.
The first guy says, "I think the fastest thing in the world is a jet airplane." How so, say his friends. "Well, those jets go faster than the speed of sound, you know, and you can fly from New York to LA in less than five hours, so that's pretty fast." His friends all nodded in agreement.
The second guy then says, "Yeah, planes are pretty fast, but I know something that's even faster and that's lightning. You know, lightning is electricity, and it can move from the sky to the ground in a split second." The others all agreed with the second man on this point.
The third guy then says, "Well I think the fastest thing in the world is the human mind." The others were a bit perplexed by this statement and they asked the third man to explain his reasoning. "Well," he says, "sometimes your mind can figure out that something is going to happen even before it occurs. For example, if you accidently put your hand near a hot stove, sometimes your mind figures out that you will burn your hand and makes you pull it away before you actually touch the stove." The others were quite impressed with this line of thinking and nodded their agreement.
Finally, the fourth guy says, "Yeah, you guys all came up with pretty good ideas, but I think the fastest thing in the world is my bowels." Completely confused, the others asked him to explain how his bowels could possibly be faster than the other things that were mentioned. "Well," he says, "last week I was on a jet airplane flying from New York to LA. In the middle of the flight, the plane was hit by lightning, and before my mind knew what was happening, I shit all over myself!" |
