According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal
bands used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds
has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington
Biological Survey, abbreviated:
Wash. Biol. Surv.
until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper:
"Dear Sirs:
While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you it was horrible."
The bands are now marked Fish and Wildlife Service.
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A young couple, married just a couple of weeks, returns from their honeymoon
to face the beginning of their new lives. The next morning the husband wakes
up, showers, dresses and makes his way to the kitchen where he sees his new
wife crying.
So the husband inquires, "What's wrong, Honey?"
"Well, I came down here this morning to surprise you with a big breakfast,
but I can't cook or clean."
The husband smiles his biggest smile and says, "There, there sweetie! I
don't care that you can't cook and clean. Come on up to the bedroom and
I'll show you what I'd like for breakfast."
So off they went to the bedroom.
That afternoon, the husband comes home for lunch to find his new wife crying
again in the kitchen. "What's wrong now, Sweetie?"
"Well, the same thing as this morning. I came in here to make you something
for lunch and I just can't cook."
Again the husband smiles and says, "Why don't you come back up to the
bedroom and I'll have my lunch there!"
So off they went to the bedroom again.
That evening the new husband comes home, walks in the house and sees his new
bride naked sliding down the banister of the stairs. Up she runs, and
WHOOSH down the banister. After the third trip the husband asks, "What are
you doing, Honey?"
"Warming up your supper!" she replies.
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A husband, wife and a son walk into an ice-cream shop. The dad says I'll
have a chocolate, the wife says I'll have a vanilla. Then the dad slaps his
son in the back of the head and says "What do you want fat head?"
The lady helping them says "Why did you hit him in the back of the head and
call him fat head?"
The husband says, "There are three things in life a man wants: The 1st thing
is a nice big truck. And you see that nice big truck sitting there
(outside) that's my nice truck. The 2nd thing in life a man wants is a nice
big house. You seen that nice big house on top of the hill on the edge of
town? That's my big house. The 3rd thing in life a man wants is a nice tight
pussy and I had that until fat head came along." |
