Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke Message Board

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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

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To: bluejeans who wrote (7480)	10/23/1998 8:26:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	of 62558

INSPIRATIONAL POSTERS FOR THE WORKPLACE If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings; they did it by killing those who opposed them. We put the "k" in "kwality." If something doesn't feel right, you're not feeling the right thing. Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat. Two Days Without a Human Rights Violation! Plagiarism saves time. If at first you don't succeed ... try management. At least you're not being rectally probed by aliens. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. This can't go on forever -- even the Third Reich only lasted 12 years. TEAMWORK ... means never having to take all the blame yourself. The beatings will continue until morale improves. If at first you don't succeed ... DELEGATE! Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups. Hang in there ... retirement is only 30 years away. INDECISION is the key to FLEXIBILITY. Aim Low; Avoid Disappointment. Look on the bright side ... at least you're not working in an IRAQI tank brigade. You pretend to work, and we'll pretend to pay you. There are two kinds of people in life: people who like their jobs and people who don't work here anymore. It's only unethical if you get caught. Remember: In real life, the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train.

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