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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke
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To: Frederick Meacoe who wrote (7986)12/4/1998 2:57:00 PM
From: Tomato   of 62592
 
> Santa's Really Bitter
>
> 'Twas the night before Christmas - Old Santa was pissed
> He cussed out the elves and threw down his list
> Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks
> I have good mind to scrap the whole works
>
> I've busted my ass for damn near a year
> Instead of "Thanks Santa" - what do I hear
> The old lady bitches cause I work late at night
> The elves want more money - The reindeer all fight
>
> Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids
> Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS
> And just when I thought that things would get better
> Those assholes from IRS sent me a letter
>
> They say I owe taxes - if that ain't damn funny
> Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money
> And the kids these days - they all are the pits
> They want the impossible ...Those mean little shits
>
> I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
> Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
> I made a ton of yo yo's - No request for them
> They want computers and robots...they think I'm IBM!
>
> If you think that's bad...just picture this
> Try holding those brats...with their pants full of piss
> They pull on my nose - they grab at my beard
> And if I don't smile..the parents think I'm weird
>
> Flying through the air...dodging the trees
> Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
> I'm quitting this job...there's just no enjoyment
> I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment
> There's no Christmas this year...now you know the reason
> I found me a blonde.. I'm going SOUTH for the season!!
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