Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke Message Board

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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

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To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (10345)	6/17/1999 9:25:00 PM
From: Zencone	Read Replies (1) of 62549

Bright Women Quotes 1. I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb ... and I also know that I'm not blonde. -Dolly Parton- 2. You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. -Erica Jong- 3. I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. -Rita Rudner- 4. My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. -Rita Rudner- 5. I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. -Wendy Liebman- 6. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. -Erma Bombeck- 7. If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them. -Sue Grafton- 8. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. -Roseanne Barr- 9. I think -- therefore I'm single. -Lizz Winstead- 10. When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country 11. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. -Maryon Pearson- 12. I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch. -Gilda Radner- 13. In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. -Margaret Thatcher- 14. I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. -Gloria Steinhem- 16. I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. -Marie Corelli- 17. Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths. -Baroness Edith Summerskill- 18. If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? -Linda Ellerbee- 19. I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. -Zsa Zsa Gabor-

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