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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke
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To: Mephisto who wrote (12054)10/18/1999 8:45:00 AM
From: John Carragher  Read Replies (1) of 62549
 
38 Reasons Why Men Should Be Proud of Themselves
>
> Telephone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
>
> You know stuff about tanks.
>
> A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
>
> You can open all your own jars.
>
> Dry cleaners and hair cutters don't rob you blind.
>
> You can go to the bathroom without a support group.
>
> You don't have to learn to spell a new last name.
>
> You can leave the motel bed unmade.
>
> You can kill your own food.
>
> You get extra credit for the slightest act of
>thoughtfulness.
>
> Wedding plans take care of themselves.
>
> If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or
>she can still be friends.
>
> Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
>
> If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
>
> Everything on your face stays its original color.
>
> You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's
>seat.
>
> Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
>
> You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter
>reader is coming.
>
> Car mechanics tell you the truth.
>
> You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours
>without thinking: "He must be mad at me."
>
> Same work...more pay.
>
> Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.
>
> Wedding dress -- $2,000. Tuxedo rental -- $75
>
> You don't mooch off other's desserts.
>
> You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring
>a little gift.
>
> If another guy shows up at the party in the same
>outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
>
> Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with "So,
>notice anything different?"
>
> You are not expected to know the names of more than
>five colors.
>
> You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a
>nut on a bolt.
>
>
> You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
>
> The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

> At least a few belches are expected and tolerated.
>
> Your belly usually hides your big hips.
>
> One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all
>seasons.
>
> You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
>
> You have freedom of choice concerning growing a
>mustache.
>
> Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25
>relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.
>
> You can name the correct state where each NFL Team is
>located, even the two from New York.
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