The Worst Death
Three guys had recently died and were awaiting entrance into Heaven.
But St. Peter appeared and informed them that, unfortunately, Heaven was only allowing 33% of applicants in today, due to overpopulation.
So, only one of the three would be allowed in. Whomever died the worst
death out of the three would be let in. St. Peter took the first man aside in private, and let him tell his story:
"For months I had been suspecting that my wife had been cheating on
me. So, one day, I decided to leave home from work early and try to catch her in the act. But when I arrived home, she was in the shower. Suspicious, I searched the house for anybody. And then I found him: He was hanging off my 25th floor balcony hoping I wouldn't see him! Fortunately, there was a hammer nearby and I bashed his fingers. He fell, but he didn't die! Outraged, I grabbed my refrigerator and chucked it down on him. It killed him instantly. But then I felt so bad about it, I took a gun and killed myself."
St. Peter thought this was certainly a decent death, and took the
second guy aside to hear his story:
"O.K. I live on the 27th floor of my apartment building, and I was out
on my balcony getting some fresh air. I yawned and took in a big stretch, and I lost my balance! I fell over the balcony, but--I was so lucky--I managed to grab another room's balcony a couple of stories down. But then, for some reason, this guy came out and bashed my hands with a hammer. I guess he was mad I was hanging off his deck. Anyway, I fell about 25 stories down, but luckier still, I wasn't dead. But as I looked up, I saw that a refrigerator
was on its way down to bash me. That's how I died."
St. Peter thought this death was quite tragic, but still took the
third guy aside to hear his story. The third guy started:
"Picture this. You're hiding, naked, in a refrigerator..."
|
