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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke
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To: E who wrote (12824)12/19/1999 3:57:00 PM
From: Edwarda  Read Replies (1) of 62549
 
It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost
> and blamed it on the cost of living.
>
> Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
>
> We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.
>
> The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting
> something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
>
> It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end,
> someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.
>
> Laughing stock - cattle with a sense of humor.
>
> You can't have everything, where would you put it?
>
> Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's
> population.
>
> If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
>
> Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.
>
> The things that come to those that wait may be
> the things left by those who got there first.
>
> Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.
> Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat drinking beer all day.
>
> Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.
>
> Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.
>
> As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
>
> When you're swimming in the creek, and an eel bites your cheek, that's
> a moray!
>
> A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
>
> It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
>
> The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.
>
> Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
>
> I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use a few.
>
> I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
>
> When you go into court you are putting yourself in the hands of
> 12 people that weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
>
> Light travels faster than sound.
> This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
>
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