WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?
PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American
DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed,
I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain.
JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people
see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going
to the "other side." That's what "they" call it: the "other side."
Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken,
you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we
sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with
seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken
should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross the road
without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was
enough for us.
ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.
SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite
justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many chickens
have to cross before you believe it?
FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken
crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity
BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross
roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
balance your checkbook, and Internet Explorer is an inextricable
part of eChicken.
EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road
move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean
by chicken? Could you define chicken please?
THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken,
thou shalt cross the road. And the chicken crossed the road
and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS
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