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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke
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To: Barney who wrote (21275)11/17/2001 8:14:37 PM
From: Barney  Read Replies (1) of 62548
 
Resume 2001
------------

OBJECTIVE:

To sit in a cubicle and stare at a monitor for
eight hours, occasionally looking attentive
when approached by a superior.

EDUCATION:

School: Very Expensive
Major: Not Important
GPA: Don't Ask, Don't Tell

EMPLOYMENT:

NETWORK MANAGEMENT (9/96-Present)
Produced daily itinerary of television programs
to watch. Duties included changing channels,
avoiding infomercials, and staying tuned after
those "important" messages.

DEBT CONSOLIDATION (4/97-12/99)
Using various tools such as credit cards and
borrowed cash, I managed to combine groups
of unpaid bills into one monthly bill that
goes straight to my father.

COMPUTER SKILLS:

*Solitaire
*Minesweeper
*On/Off Repair Method

HONORS AND AWARDS:

*First Place in Miller Lite Funnel Tournament
*Said Toast at brother's wedding
*High Score on Theta Chi's Pin Ball Machine

For further references, contact my mother. For positive
responses, please pose all questions as though you're
considering me as a law school applicant.
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