>
> Hebonics
>
>
> The New York City school board has officially declared Jewish English -
> now
> dubbed Hebonics - as a second language. Backers of the move say the city's
>
> School District is the first in the state to recognize Hebonics as a valid
>
> language and significant attribute of New York culture.
>
>
>
> According to Howard Schollman, linguistics professor at New York
> University
>
>
>
> and renowned Hebonics scholar, the sentence structure of Hebonics derives
> from middle and eastern European language patterns, as well as Yiddish.
>
>
>
> Prof. Schollman explains, "In Hebonics, the response to any question is
> usually another question plus a complaint that is implied or stated.
>
>
>
> Thus:
>
>
>
> "How are you?" may be answered, "How should I be, with my feet?"
>
>
>
> Schollman says that Hebonics is a superb linguistic vehicle for expressing
>
> sarcasm or skepticism. An example is the repetition of a word with "sh" or
>
> "shm" at the beginning:
>
>
>
> "Mountains, shmountains. Stay away. You want a nosebleed?"
>
> >
>
> Another Hebonics pattern is moving the subject of a sentence to the end,
> with
> its pronoun at the beginning: "It's beautiful, that dress."
>
>
>
> Schollman says one also sees the Hebonics verb moved to the end of the
> sentence. Thus the response to a remark such as: "He's slow as a turtle,"
> could be: "Turtle, shmurtle! Like a fly in Vaseline he walks."
>
>
>
> Schollman provided the following examples from his textbook,
> Switched-On-Hebonics.
>
> Question: "What time is it?"
>
> English answer: "Sorry, I don't know."
>
> Hebonic answer: "What am I, a clock?"
>
>
>
> Remark: "I hope things turn out okay."
>
> English response: "Thanks."
>
> Hebonic response: "I should BE so lucky!"
>
>
>
> Remark: "Hurry up. Dinner's ready."
>
> English response: "Be right there."
>
> Hebonic response: "Alright already, I'm coming. What's with the 'hurry'
> business? Is there a fire?"
>
>
>
> Remark: "I like the tie you gave me; wear it all the time." English
> response:
> "Glad you like it." Hebonic response: "So what's the matter; you don't
> like
> the other ties I gave you?
>
>
>
> Remark: "Sarah and I are engaged."
>
> English response: Congratulations!"
>
> Hebonic response: "She could stand to gain a few pounds."
>
>
>
> Question: "Would you like to go riding with us?"
>
> English answer: "Just say when."
>
> Hebonic answer: "Riding, shmiding! Do I look like a cowboy?"
>
>
>
> To guest of honor at his birthday party:
>
> English remark: "Happy birthday."
>
> Hebonic remark: "A year smarter you should become."
>
>
>
> Remark: "A beautiful day."
>
> English response: "Sure is."
>
> Hebonic response: "So the sun is out; what else is new?"
>
>
>
> Answering a phone call from son:
>
> English remark: "It's been a long time since you called." Hebonic remark:
> "You didn't wonder if I'm dead yet?"
> |
