I see you got your question answered. OJ = old jokes (thats the only ones I know) just kidding
OJ:
An Irish Fight:
Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like
he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling,
his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he's
walking with a limp.
What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender.
"Jamie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy.
"That little sod, O'Conner," says Sean, "He couldn't
do that to you, he must have had something in his hand."
"That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had,
and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."
"Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself.
Didn't you have something in your hand?"
"That I did," said Paddy. "Mrs. O'Conner's breast, and a
thing of beauty it was, but useless in a fight."
===============================
Irish Miracle:
An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is
weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over.
"So," says the cop to the driver, "where have ya been?"
"Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk.
"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a
few to drink this evening."
"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.
"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and
folding his arms across his chest, "that a few intersections
back, your wife fell out of your car?"
"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute
there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
============================
Irish Last Request:
Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady's after his
Sunday morning service, and she's in tears.
He says, "So what's bothering you, Mary my dear?"
She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My
husband passed away last night."
The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me,
did he have any last requests?"
She says, "That he did, Father..."
The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?"
She says, "He said, 'Please Mary, put down that damn gun!'" |
