Thank to all the stupid people out there we have some new Darwin nominees....
> [AP, Mammoth Lakes, CA] A San Anselmo man died yesterday when he
> hit
> a lift tower at the Mammoth Mountain ski area while riding down the
>
> slope on a foam pad, authorities said.
>
> Matthew David Hubal, 22, was pronounced dead at Centinela Mammoth
>
> Hospital. The accident occurred about 3 a.m., the Mono County
> Sheriff's Department said. Hubal and his friends apparently had
> hiked
> up a ski run called Stump Alley and undid some yellow foam
> protectors
> from the lift towers, said Lieutenant Mike Donnelly of the Mammoth
> Lakes Police Department. The pads are used to protect skiers who
> might
> hit the towers. The group apparently used the pads to slide down
> the
> ski slope and Hubal crashed into a tower.
>
> It has since been investigated that the tower he hit was the one
> with
> its pad removed.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> [AP, St. Louis, MO] Robert Puelo, 32, was apparently being
> disorderly
> in a St. Louis market. When the clerk threatened to call police,
> Puelo
> grabbed a hot dog, shoved it in his mouth, and walked out without
> paying for it.
>
> Police found him unconscious in front of the store: paramedics
> removed the six-inch wiener from his throat, where it had choked
> him
> to death.
>
> --------------------------
>
> [UPI, Spain] To poacher Marino Malerba, who shot a stag standing
> above him on an overhanging rock -- and was killed instantly when
> it
> fell on him.
>
> --------------------------
>
> Man Loses Face at Party
>
> [Associated Press, Kincaid, W. VA] A man at a party popped a
> blasting
> cap into his mouth and bit down, triggering an explosion that blew
> off
> his lips, teeth and tongue, state police said Wednesday.
>
> Jerry Stromyer, 24, of Kincaid, bit the blasting cap as a prank
> during a party late Tuesday night, said Cpl. M.D. Payne.
> "Another man had it in an aquarium, hooked to a battery, and was
> trying to explode it," Payne said. "It wouldn't go off and this guy
>
> said, "I'll show you how to set it off."
>
> "He put it in his mouth and bit down. It blew all his teeth off,
> his
> tongue and his lips," Payne said. Stromyer was listed in guarded
> condition Wednesday with extensive facial injuries, according to a
> spokesman at Charleston Area Medical Division. "I just can't
> imagine
> anyone doing something like that," Payne said.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> [UPI, Portland, OR] Doctors at Portland's University Hospital said
> Wednesday an Oregon man shot through the skull by a hunting arrow
> is
> lucky to be alive, and will be released soon from the hospital.
>
> Tony Roberts, 25, lost his right eye last weekend during an
> initiation
> into a men's rafting club, Mountain Men Anonymous, in Grants Pass,
> Ore. A friend tried to shoot a beer can off his head, but the arrow
>
> entered Roberts' right eye. Doctors said had the arrow gone 1
> millimeter to the left, a major blood vessel would have cut and
> Roberts would have died instantly.
>
> Neurosurgeon Dr. Johnny Delashaw at the University Hospital in
> Portland said the arrow went through 8 to 10 inches of brain, with
> the
> tip protruding at the rear of his skill, yet somehow managed to
> miss
> all major blood vessels.
>
> Delashaw also said had Robert tried to pull the arrow out on his
> own
> he surely would have killed himself. Roberts admitted afterwards he
>
> and his friends had been drinking that afternoon. Said Roberts, "I
> feel so dumb about this."
>
> No charges have been filed but the Josephine County district
> attorney's office said the initiation stunt is under investigation.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Pillsbury Dough Boy Wanted for Attempted Murder.
>
> [AP, Arkansas] A woman named Linda went to Arkansas last week to
> visit her in-laws, and while there, went to a store. She parked
> next
> to a car with a woman sitting in it, her eyes closed and hands
> behind
> her head, apparently sleeping. When Linda came out a while
> later,she
> again saw the woman, her hands still behind her head but with her
> eyes
> open. The woman looked very strange, so Linda tapped on the window
> and said "Are you okay?"
>
> The woman answered "I've been shot in the head, and I am holding my
> brains in." Linda didn't know what to do; so she ran into the store
> where store officials called the paramedics. They had to break into the
> car because the door was locked.
>
> When they got in, they found that the woman had bread dough on the
> back of her head and in her hands. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had
> exploded, apparently from the heat in the car, making a loud explosion
> like that of a gunshot, and hit her in the head. When she
> reached back to find what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was
> herbrains.
> She passed out from fright at first, then attempted to hold her
> brains in!
The Federal Government settled a $9 million law suit last week in North Carolina that was filed by residents in that state. The suit alledged that the chemical MTBE is contaminating the ground water and causing health problems for the residents. MTBE is a gasoline additive that is mandated by the EPA in regions of the country that fail clean air standards. MTBE does not combust in the vehicle or break down in the environment. It passes through the exhaust system and settles out on the ground. It has been determined to cause cancer and other serious health problems and it does nothing to improve air quality.
I would like to personally nominate the EPA and Congress for the Darwin Award. |
