Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy". I call
mine Sex. Sex has been embarrassing to me. When I went to
City Hall to renew his license, I told the clerk I would
like to have a license for Sex; he said he would like one too.
Then I said, "But this is a dog." He said he didn't care
what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand.
I have had Sex since I was 9 years old." He said I must
have been quite a kid.
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog
with me. I told the clerk that I wanted a room for my wife
and me, and a special room for Sex.
He said that every room in the place was for sex. I said,
"You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night." The
clerk said, "Me too."
One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the
competition began, the dog ran away and a contestant asked
me why I was standing there looking around. I told him I
had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me
that I should have sold my own tickets. "But you
don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV."
He called me a show-off.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to
fight for custody of the dog.
I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married." The
judge said, "Me too." Then I told him that after I was
separated, Sex left me. He said "Me too."
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around
town for him. A cop came over to me and asked me, "What are
you doing in this alley at 4:00 in the morning." I said, "I
am looking for Sex." My case comes up on Friday. |
