!) Do you know why it takes a Republican 12 months to get from New York City to Los Angeles?
Answer: A Republican would never ride on a socialized interstate highway system in a car that burns ethanol fuel that has a .45 cent subsidy paid to the oil companies for each gallon burned.
2) Do you know why 99% of the Republicans carry a step ladder in their truck when they pass a private country club?
Answer: They want to climb up and look over the fence to see what the other 1% is doing and learn why they keep yelling Fore, and they never hear them yell—Five, Six, Seven, Eight.
3) Do you know why Republicans wear face masks and condoms when they go to their drug store to buy their drugs?
Answer: They know the majority of the drugs they buy are produced and owned by foreign companies that have socialized medicine where their citizens get the same drug for more than 50% less than they are paying, so when they are dealing with a foreign company that isn’t screwing their own citizens, they don’t want to be recognized and since they are being screwed they want to practice safe sex.
4) Do you know why the Republicans like to eat their own feces and drink their own urine?
Answer: Though it galls them to recycle they know that our food crop growers and water utilities are the most taxpayer subsidized industries in this country they would never use anything that comes from a socialized endeavor.
5) Do you know what protracted wars for Republican presidents and Jewish merchants with cleaned out shelves say to each other on Christmas Day?
Answer: Boy! Business has been good this year.
6) Do you know why a Republican stay-home dad didn’t mind his wife working for Bill Clinton and being screwed by just one more Democrat president?
Answer: He was at home and got to open her quarterly IRA statement that showed at least if she was hiding the big salami, she was bringing home the bacon. Plus, he got Barron's today!
Barron’s(Owned by Rupert Murdoch So This Must Be True)
SATURDAY, DECEMBER 3, 2011 Democratic Market Magic
By JIM MCTAGUE | MORE ARTICLES BY AUTHOR
Gripe as you may about President Obama and the economy, he's been good for stocks. And if history is a guide, he'll be just as good if re-elected. Dozens of research papers have concluded that the stock market performs noticeably better during Democratic administrations than it does during Republican ones. No one can explain exactly why this is so. But as Pedro Santa-Clara and Rossen Valkanov pointed out in a June 2001 paper, "Political Cycles and the Stock Market," the superiority of returns under Democrats is "economically and statistically significant."
The trend has continued since that paper was published.
"If you look at real GDP growth between 1949 and 2011, when we've had Democratic presidents, the average growth rate has been 4.43%; the average growth rate when we've had Republicans has been 2.43%," says Former Clinton Treasury Secretary Larry Summers, who also was Obama's top economic advisor during his critical first two years in office. "If you look at the change in the S&P—it was 12% with Democrats and 6% with Republicans," he adds. |
