Here are some of the most recent jokes about Slick
Warning--NOT POLITCALLY CORRECT (big surprise there...)
PUBLIC: Bill Clinton Jokes
> Q: Why was it difficult for Clinton to fire Monica Lewinsky?
> A: He couldn't giver her a pink slip without asking her to try it on
> first.
> Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and Bob Dole have in common?
> A: They were both upset when Bill finished first.
> Q: What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
> A: When Hillary is out of town.
> Q: What is the difference between Clinton and the Titanic?
> A: Only 200 women went down on the Titanic.
> Q: How does Bill keep Monica Lewinsky away from the White House?
> A: He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her a ride.
> President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see
> one of his aides nervously approach him. "What is it?" exclaims the
> President. "It's this Abortion Bill Mr. President, what do you want
> to do about it?" the aide replies. "Just go ahead and pay it."
> responds the President.
> So it's about Bill Clinton's new revelations about his sex life.
> Seems today he finally admitted that he had sex with Gennifer
> Flowers a couple of times....but he didn't come.
> Q. What does Bill say to Hillary after a romantic interlude?
> A: "Honey, I'll be home in 20 minutes."
> Q: Why does Bill Clinton cheat on Hillary?
> A: He wants to be on top.
> Q: How did Bill Clinton paralyze Hillary from the waist down?
> A: He married her.
> Clinton is looking out of the window and he notices that someone has
> urinated the message, "BILL SUCKS!" on a wall outside the White
> House. Furious, he orders the FBI to take urine and handwriting
> samples from every member of the White House staff and find the
> culprit immediately. A week later, the FBI director calls. "Mr.
> President, I have good news and bad news," he says. "The good news
> is that the urine belongs to Bob Dole." "And the bad news?" Clinton
> demands. After a slight pause, the director replies, "Sir, the
> handwriting belongs to your wife!"
> Q: How many women does it take to satisfy Bill Clinton's sexual
> appetite?
> A: It Takes A Village!
> President French-Fry was out jogging when a Hooker standing on the
> corner hailed him. "Hey Mr. President! Fifty bucks!" "No, no." Bill
> replied with a grin, "Five bucks!" and kept on jogging. This
> exchange soon became a part of the President's normal routine. Each
> day as he'd approach the corner, the hooker would yell out, "Hey Mr.
> President... Fifty Bucks!" and Bill would holler back, "No, Five
> Bucks!" Well, one day, Hillary decided she wanted to go jogging with
> Bill. As they neared the corner, Bill suddenly realized what a
> terrible scene was about to happen. Sure enough, there was the
> hooker, and just like all the other times she smiled and waved and
> yelled out, "Hey Mr. President......See what you get for Five
> Bucks!"
> Q: How does Bill Clinton teach a woman to golf?
> A: He starts with the irons and ends up in the woods.
> Q: When did Clinton realize Paula Jones wasn't a Democrat?
> A: When she didn't swallow everything he presented.
> "One thing's for sure about Clinton...
> He sure doesn't neglect domestic affairs!"
> Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and a gigolo?
> A: A gigolo can only screw one person at a time.
> Q: What's the definition of an Arkansas Virgin?
> A: A girl that can run faster than the Governor.
> Q: What does Teddy Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes *he* did?
> A: A dead girlfriend.
> Q: Why did Bill go out to sea on an aircraft carrier?
> A: To promote off-shore drilling.
> Q: What game did Bill Clinton want Paula Jones to play?
> A: Swallow the leader
> Q: Why is Clinton so interested in events in the Middle East?
> A: He thinks the Gaza Strip is a topless bar. |
