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Politics : Did Slick Boink Monica?
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To: Zoltan! who wrote (10918)3/16/1998 3:18:00 PM
From: Janice Shell  Read Replies (3) of 20981
 
All:

I have an announcement. Tomorrow I shall fly to Washington, and the day after, flanked by at least three attorneys, I shall give a press conference in which I shall categorically state that I have NEVER had oral sex with Bill Clinton. I am tired of having my name dragged through the dirt, and so on.

I shall further declare that I did not have oral sex with him in the Oval Office or in any neighboring area; in any hotel in D.C. or elsewhere; or in the swimming pool at Camp David when Hillary was at Davos. I shall strongly deny having had oral sex with Bill Clinton three times on the green of the sixth hole at Pebble Beach on August 7th and 8th, 1994.

Taht done, I will, of course, immediately be subpoenaed by Ken Starr. The press will begin to investigate. They will (gasp!) discover that I was indeed at Wellesley when Hillary was there! They will ask Hillary about me. She will deny ever having met me. Suspicious! They will further learn that one of my good friends in college was from Little Rock; she now practices law there. When asked, she'll say that we haven't been in touch for twenty years. A likely story!

And THEN.....they'll find out that....Al Gore and I were born on the same day!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I'm gonna be RICH and FAMOUS!!

But first I'm gonna go eat my pizza...
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