Matt's dad picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment.
Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he
asked his son if he got a part.
Matt enthusiastically announced that he'd gotten a part. "I play a man who's
been married for twenty years."
"That's great, son. Keep up the good work and before you know it they'll be
giving you a speaking part."
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They've found a new use for sheep in Iraq. WOOL!
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After just two days of driving through Mexico, Steve was sick and
tired of Mexicans. "Damn wetbacks," he told his wife. "They hate
Americans. I swear to God, the next one I see, I'm going to make that
son of a bitch suffer!"
As it happened, Steve's anger was such that he didn't look where he
was going, and he rear-ended a brawny farmer in a pickup truck. The
Mexican came over and leaned in Steve's window."
"Hey, greengo--why did you heet my truck?"
"Because I can't stand you or any other smelly Mexican greaseball!"
Steve ranted. "In fact, if you're man enough, I'm going to come out
and kick the shit out of you!"
The Mexican motioned Steve out. "I make a deal weet you," he said.
"If you ween, you take my truck. If I ween, not only do I fuck your
wife, but you weel hold my balls to keep them off the hot street."
The men agreed and fought. Later, Steve was smiling as he and his
wife drove off.
"I told you I'd make some Mexican suffer!" he gloated.
His wife looked at him. "What the HELL are you talking about?!"
Steve smiled. "Did you hear how he screamed when I dropped his
balls on the asphalt?"
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What does a Polish girl do after she sucks a cock?
Spit out the feathers.
I hear a certain cereal company is test marketing a new version
of "Nut'n Honey" cereal in the ghetto. It's called:
"Nuttin' Bitch"
What happens when a Jew with a hard-on walks into a wall?
He breaks his nose.
How do you get an Italian woman pregnant?
Cum in her shoes and let the flies do the rest!
Why aren't there any significant works of art from Puerto Rican
artists prior to 1957? That's the year spray paint was invented.
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A lady called in to 911:
Lady: Officer, there is a Democrat jacking off in my backyard!
Cop: What's happening?!?!
Lady: There is a Democrat jacking off in my backyard!!!
Cop: How do you know he is a Democrat?
Lady: Well, if he was a Republican he would be screwing someone else!
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What did one gay sperm say to the other?
How can you see through all this shit?!
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The latest development in the Clinton - Lewinsky intrigue is the Monica
had coughed up yet another piece of evidence!
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