Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke Message Board

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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

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To: Jack Colton who wrote (8541)	1/23/1999 12:48:00 AM
From: Jack Colton	Read Replies (1) of 62549

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it dawned on me...they were cramming for their finals. VENI, VEDI, VISA: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the OTHERS here for? STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. Clones are people two. If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong? Go ahead and take risks...just be sure that everything will turn out OK.. No one ever says "It's only a game" when their team is winning. As I said before, I never repeat myself! If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag? Nostalgia isn't what it used to be. Think "honk" if you're telepathic ALWAYS GIVE 100% AT WORK: 12% Monday 23% Tuesday 40% Wednesday 20% Thursday 5% Friday Jesus loves you. It's everybody else that thinks you're an ass. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was, "Always". Can you yell "MOVIE!" in a crowded firestation? It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy? To vacillate or not to vacillate, that is the question.... ....or is it? Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep. Be nice to your kids. They will be choosing your nursing home. I still miss my ex. But my aim is getting better! I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. She gets mad if I interrupt her. A closed mouth gathers no feet. If women can have PMS, then men can have ESPN. Remember, half the people in the world are below average.

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