I actually feel for the guy. I really do. And quite honestly, some of these are pure nit-picking on the part of the press. But some of these are just plain funny:
================================================
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, to the Phoenix Republican Forum, 3/23/90
(reported in Esquire, 8/92) Also reported by Reuters, 5/2/90
"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and
child."
-- Senator Dan Quayle, US News and World Report (10/10/88)
"Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle addressing the 20th anniversary celebration of the moon landing, 7/20/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 8/11/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle winning friends while speaking to the United Negro College Fund, 5/9/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92) (reported in the NY Times, 12/9/92)
"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century."
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 9/15/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92, The New Yorker, 10/10/88, p.102)
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 5/22/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice
president, and that one word is 'to be prepared.'"
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 12/6/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"May our nation continue to be the beakon of hope to the world."
-- The Quayles' 1989 Christmas card. [Not a beacon of literacy, though.]
"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 10/30/88 (reported in Esquire,8/92 and the LA Times, 10/30/88)
"We don't want to go back to tomorrow, we want to go forward."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"I have made good judgements in the Past. I have made good
judgements in the Future." -- Vice President Dan Quayle
"The future will be better tomorrow."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world."
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 9/21/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"And it was a very good book of Rasputin's involvement in that, which shows how people that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history."
-- Senator Dan Quayle gives his opinion of the book 'Nicholas and
Alexandra,' to Hendrick Hertzberg of the New Republic, 9/28/88 (reported in Savvy Woman, 1/89, p. 56)
"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle to Sam Donaldson, 8/17/89
(reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a *part* of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a *part* of Europe."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"Public speaking is very easy."
-- Senator Dan Quayle to reporters in 10/88
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"When I have been asked during these last weeks who caused the riots and the killing in L.A., my answer has been direct and simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle giving an intelligent, in-depth analysis of the LA riots. (during the Commonwealth Club speech 5/19/92)
"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 5/20/92 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"Murphy Brown is doing better than I am. At least she knows she still has a job next year."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 8/18/92, (reported on KRXX News)
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur." -- Vice President Dan Quayle talking about the Mideast situation, 9/22/90 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, talking to NASA employees,
9/5/90 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 9/18/90 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, in a speech to the American Society of
Newspaper Editors, April 1991
"We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, (USA Today 4/22/92)
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people."
-- J. Danforth Quayle
"The US has a vital interest in that area of the country."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle referring to Latin America.
"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle on the concept of a manned mission to Mars.
"Tobacco exports should be expanded aggressively because Americans are
smoking less."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 1990 (reported by IPS, 8/14/92).
"I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman."
-- Senator Dan Quayle
"Let me say it one more time. It is ill-rel-e-vant."
-- Senator Dan Quayle testily responding to repeated questions about his parents' involvement in the John Birch Society. (reported in the Washington Post, 10/10/88)
This president is going to lead us out of this recovery. It will happen.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle at a campaign stop at CA tate University,
Fresno, 1/17/92.
"If Ross Perot runs, that's good for us. If he doesn't run, it's good for us." [A reporter then asked him what he meant by that] "That's for you to figure out."
-- Vice-President Dan Quayle answering a reporter's question on what the effect might be if Perot re- entered the race.
"We have been pushing the idea George Bush is going to make
matters much, much worse by holding the line on taxes, a balanced budget amendment..."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle while on 'CBS This Morning', 10/27/92 (reported by the Chicago Tribune and by the Star-Ledger on 10/28/92)
"I wear their scorn as a badge of honor."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle discussing how he copes with criticism from the media elite, 6/9/92 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"It's sort of like define pornography. You know it when you see one. You know a cultural elitist when you see one."
[Jim Lehrer: Who are they?]
"They know who they are."
[Jim Lehrer: Yes, but who are they?]
"You know and I know."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle describing who he is talking about when he refers to the cultural elite, 6/19/92, The
McNeil/Lehrer Report.
"Hawaii is a unique state. It is a small state. It is a state that is by itself. It is a-it is different than the other 49 states. Well, all states are different, but it's got a particularly unique situation."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle when a woman at a hospital in Colorado Springs asked Mr. Quayle whether Hawaii's universal health-care plan might serve as a national model. (reported in the NY Times, 10/7/92 and the Ft. Wayne Journal Gazette 10/11/92)
"Somewhere between real and real real."
-- Senator Dan Quayle pinpointing their location to reporters aboard the Quayle campaign plane. (reported in Wall Street Journal, 10/21/88)
"It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 4/30/91
"We're in Florida."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle explaining why he had just purchased four
peaches (and no citrus fruits-for which Florida is famous) at a Publix
supermarket in Oakland Park, Florida. Georgia (which IS famous for peaches) did not gain from the transaction, however; the peaches were from Chile. (The Sunstenial)
"It's rural America. It's where I came from. We always refer to ourselves as real America. Rural America, real America, real, real, America."
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 10/20/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"You all look like happy campers to me. Happy campers you are, happy campers you have been, and, as far as I am concerned, happy campers you will always be."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, to the American Samoans, whose capital Quayle pronounces 'Pogo Pogo', 4/25/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"It's a good Supreme Court. They're lawyers... they're judges...they're appointed for life."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle on being asked about the
verdict in the Supreme Court ruling on the PA abortion law case. (Broadcast on ABC's 'Prime Time Live', August 10, 1992)
"We will move forward, we will move upward, and yes, we will move onward."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle to a group of students at a Chicago school, 4/24/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"I've heard people say that [I have a short attention span]. I don't feel I do, because when I'm interested in something I'll stay in focus as long as it is necessary... If you get off on something I'm not very interested in, it's very easy for me to block it out. It's easy for me to block things out."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 12-JAN-92
"I was known as the chief grave robber of my state."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"[The US] condones violence in El Salvador."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle reveals what people have known for years.
1/31/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"We expect them [Salvadoran officials] to work toward the elimination of human rights in accordance with the pursuit of Justice."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 2/3/89 (reported in The Chicago Tribune,
2/4/89)
"El Salvador is a democracy so it's not surprising that there are many
voices to be heard here. Yet in my conversations with Salvadorans... I have heard a single voice."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"Japan is an important ally of ours. Japan and the United States of the Western industrialized capacity, 60 percent of the GNP, two countries. That's a statement in and of itself."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 10/2/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"Who would have predicted... that Dubcek, who brought the tanks in
Czechoslovakia in 1968 is now being proclaimed a hero in Czechoslovakia. Unbelievable."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle. Actually, Dubcek was the leader of the Prague Spring.
"Perestroika is nothing more than refined Stalinism."
-- Senator Dan Quayle (9/04/88)
"[The US victory in Gulf war was] a stirring victory for the forces of
aggression."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 4/11/91 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"I'm ready."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle describing his ability to take over the
presidency after President Bush vomits and collapses in Tokyo, 1/8/92
(reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"[The US is] naked, absolutely nude, to attack [by the Soviets]."
-- Senator Dan Quayle at the Ohio State Fair, 8/20/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"Vietnam is a jungle. You had jungle warfare. Kuwait, Iraq, Saudi Arabia, you have sand. [There is no need to worry about a protracted war because] from a historical basis, Middle East conflicts do not last a long time."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, 10/2/90 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"The destruction, it is just very heart-rendering."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle attempting to say the SF
earthquake wreckage was heart-rending (Newsweek 10/30/89)
"My friends, no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will never, never surrender to what is right."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle speaking to the Christian
Coalition about the need for abstinence to avoid AIDS, 11/15/91 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"Are they taking DDT?"
-- Vice President Dan Quayle asking doctors at a Manhattan AIDS clinic about their treatments of choice, 4/30/92 (reported in Esquire, 8/92, and NY Post early May 92)
"This isn't a man who is leaving with his head between his legs."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle discussing John Sununu's resignation and
apparent lack of flexibility, 12/6/91
"Unfortunately, the people of Louisiana are not racists."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, regarding David Duke's
candidacy, 10/12/90, (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"I am now cashing in on being vice president for others. They'll remember me. I'll remember them."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"What you guys want, I'm for."
-- Senator Dan Quayle to farmers on a local pork issue
(8/25/88)
"Looking back, I should have pursued philosophy and economics and things of that sort in college more, but I didn't."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"I didn't pay a lot of attention as I should have in college."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle
"I'll have to check with my dad."
-- Dan Quayle responding when an Indiana GOP county chairman asked him to run for Congress in 1976. (reported by the Washington Post, 10/2/88)
"I know one committee I don't want-Judiciary. They are going to be dealing with all those issues like abortion, bussing, voting rights, prayers. I'm not interested in those issues and I want to stay as far away from them as I can."
-- Senator Dan Quayle
"Lookit, I've done it their way this far and now it's my turn. I'm my own handler. Any questions? Ask me ... There's not going to be any more handler stories because I'm the handler ... I'm Doctor Spin."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle responding to press reports that his aides have had to, in effect, 'potty train' him.
"[Americans will soon observe the 20th anniversary of] Neil
Armstrong and Buzz Lukens' walk on the moon."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle confusing the sexual assaulter/Congressman with Astronaut Buzz Aldrin, 7/15/89 Los Angeles Times (7/16/89)
"...Buzz Lukens took that fateful step..."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle continuing to confuse the sexual
assaulter/Congressman with Astronaut Buzz Aldrin, 7/15/89 (reported in
Esquire, 8/92)
"I would guess that there's adequate low-income housing in this country."
-- Senator Dan Quayle, 10/27/88 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"Add one little bit on the end... Think of 'potatoe', how's it spelled? You're right phonetically, but what else...? There ya go... all right!"
-- Vice President Dan Quayle correcting a student's correct spelling of the word 'potato' during a spelling bee at an elementary school in Trenton
"Office of the Vice President... The Council on Competativeness."
-- the letterhead on stationery, complete with misspelling, found in Dan Quayle's old White House office by Clinton adminstration staffers. (Newsweek, 2/8/93)
"The other day [the President] said, I know you've had some rough times, and I want to do something that will show the nation what faith that I have in you, in your maturity and sense of responsibility. [He paused, then said] Would you like a puppy?"
-- Vice President Dan Quayle (LA Times 5/21/89)
"I'm the Vice-President. They know it, and they know that I know it."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle talking about his political
enemies, 3/13/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
"[Abortion] is not an issue with the American people. It is a figment of your imagination if you think that this is an issue that is talked about a lot."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle to reporters while flying back to Washington on September 23. [From the Associated Press
9/24/92]
"Most women do not want to be liberated from their essential
natures as women."
-- Vice-President Dan Quayle, while campaigning in Kansas City, MO, 9/2/92 (reported in the NY times, 9/3/92)
"Speaking as a man, it's not a woman's issue. Us men are tired of losing our women."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle talking about breast cancer
"The loss of life will be irreplaceable."
-- Vice President Dan Quayle after the San Francisco earthquake, 10/19/89 (reported in Esquire, 8/92)
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