Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke Message Board

STOCKTALK

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor. We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community. If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

Public Reply Prvt Reply Mark as Last Read File

Previous 10 Next 10 Previous Next

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (8642)	2/9/1999 5:13:00 PM
From: William	Read Replies (1) of 62549

Friday It's beginning to snow. This is the first of the season and the first one that we've seen for years. My wife and I took our hot buttered rums and sat by the picture window, watching the large white flakes drifting down, clinging to the bushes and branches and covering the ground. It was beautiful. Saturday We awoke to a lovely blanket of crystal white snow covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight it was! Every tree and shrub covered with a beautiful white mantle. I shoveled snow for the first time in years and loved it. I did both the drive and the sidewalk. Later a snowplow came along and accidentally covered up the driveway with compacted snow from the street. The driver smiled and waved. I waved back and shoveled again. Sunday It snowed an additional 8 inches last night and the temperature has dropped to 17 degrees. Several limbs on the trees and shrubs snapped due to the weight of the snow. I shoveled the driveway again. Shortly afterwards the snowplow came by and did his trick again. Much of the snow is now brownish-grey. Monday It warmed up enough during the day to create some slush which became solid ice when the sun set. Purchased snow tires for both cars - $260. Fell on my ass in the driveway. $235 for X-rays, but nothing had broken. More snow and ice promised overnight. Tuesday 6 more inches overnight. The driveway is a mess. Turning colder. Had to sell the wife's car and bought a 4 x 4 in order to get us to work. Slid into a guardrail and did $3800 damage to new SUV. Had another 8 inches of white shit during the day. Took all evening to shovel out. Both vehicles covered in salt and crud. The goddam snowplow came by twice. Wednesday 9 degrees outside. More fuckin snow. All the trees and shrubs have been damaged. Electric was off most of the night. Tried to keep from freezing to death with candles and a kerosene heater that tipped over and nearly burned the house down. I managed to put the flames out, but suffered 2nd degree burns on my face and lost all my eyelashes and eyebrows. Pipes burst and flooded the playroom and furnace room. BMW slid on the ice on the way to the emergency room and was totaled. Thursday Goddam mother fuckin white shit keeps on coming down. Have to put on all the clothes we own just to get to the fuckin mailbox. If I ever catch the son-of-a-bitch that drives the snowplow I'll chew open his chest and rip out his heart. I think he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then comes down the street at 80 mph and buries our driveway again. Toilets froze and part of the roof has started to cave in. Friday 9 goddam more fuckin inches fuckin snow and fuckin ice and god knows what other kind of white fuckin shit fell last night. I wounded the fuckin snowplow asshole with an ice ax but he got away. Wife left me. Car won't start. Roof gone. I think I'm going snow-blind. I can't move my toes. Haven't seen the sun in weeks. More fuckin white shit predicted. Wind chill 15 fuckin degrees below zero. Forecast snow all weekend.

Report TOU Violation

Share This Post

Public Reply Prvt Reply Mark as Last Read File

Previous 10 Next 10 Previous Next