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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Elmer Flugum who wrote (10255)	6/13/1999 7:57:00 PM
From: Kenneth V. McNutt	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 62549

The old country doctor went out to the boonies to deliver a baby. It was so far out there was no electricity. When he arrive he found only the laboring mother and her 5 year old son. The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high while he delivered the baby. The child did so and with much pushing the baby was finally born. The doctor lifted the baby by its feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first breath. The doctor then asked the child what he thought of the baby.? "Hit him again," said the lad. "He shouldn't have crawled up in there in the first place!"

To: Elmer Flugum who wrote (10255)	6/14/1999 10:16:00 AM
From: SIer formerly known as Joe B.	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Feces Painting Divides Art Lovers Monday June 14 8:41 AM ET dailynews.yahoo.com FRANKFURT (Reuters) - German art lovers are turning up their noses at an abstract picture painted with the artist's own feces. The painting, on display at Frankfurt's Museum of Modern Art, depicts brown, egg-like shapes surrounded by an off-white line. It doesn't smell because it is coated with resin, German tabloid daily newspaper Bild reported. The 35-year-old artist, Anton Henning, said he had eaten a large meal to give himself sufficient material for the painting. ''It was created in 1995 after I enjoyed a meal of Koenigsberg dumplings, mustard gherkins, beetroot, potatoes, watermelon and lemon juice, Rheingau riesling wine and a big brownie,'' he told the paper. Henning guarantees that he did not need to dilute his feces in order to complete his oeuvre. The picture has suffered a mixed reception. ''Yuk, it really makes me want to throw up,'' one 50-year-old woman told the newspaper. ''It's sick,'' said a 29-year-old man. ''The colors are fantastic,'' countered another 50-year-old woman who viewed the painting. ''I'd find a space for that in my home.''