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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: JakeStraw who wrote (10516)	6/29/1999 10:30:00 AM
From: Carol Putnam	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

>> SIGNS THAT YOU ARE NO LONGER A KID: >> >> You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead. >> You can live without sex, but not without glasses. >> Your back goes out more than you do. >> You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into >> the room. >> You buy a compass for the dash of your car. >> You are proud of your lawn mower. >> Your best friend is dating someone half his age...and isn't >> breaking any laws. >> Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper. >> You sing along with the elevator music. >> You would rather go to work than stay home sick. >> You constantly talk about the price of gasoline. >> You enjoy hearing about other people's operations. >> You consider coffee one of the most important things in life. >> You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge. >> People call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?" >> You have a dream about prunes. >> You answer questions with "Because I said so!" >> You send money to PBS. >> The end of your tie doesn't come anywhere near the top of your >> belt. >> You take a metal detector to the beach. >> You wear black socks with sandals. >> You know what the word equity means. >> You can't remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch >> television. >> Your ears are hairier than your head. >> You talk about "good grass" and you're referring to someone's >> lawn. >> You get into a heated argument about pension plans. >> You got cable for the weather channel. >> You can go bowling without drinking. >> You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.