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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: John Messbauer who wrote (10572)	7/4/1999 3:14:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

What Your Car Says About You Acura Integra- I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars Acura Legend- I'm too bland for German cars Acura NSX- I am impotent Audi 90- I enjoy putting out engine fires Buick Park Avenue- I am older than 34 of the 50 states Cadillac Eldorado- I am a very good Mary Kay salesman Cadillac Seville- I am a pimp Chevrolet Camaro- I enjoy beating up people Chevrolet Chevette- I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a ‘Vette Chevrolet Corvette- I'm in a mid-life crisis Chevrolet El Camino- I am leading a militia to overthrow the government Chrysler Cordoba- I dig the rich Corinthian leather Datsun 280Z- I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well Dodge Dart- I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower Dodge Daytona- I delivered pizza for four years to get this car Ford Fairmont- (See Dodge Dart) Ford Mustang- I slow down to 85 in school zones Ford Crown Victoria- I enjoy having people slow to 55mph & change lanes when I pull up behind them Geo Storm- I will start the 11th grade in the Fall. Geo Tracker- I will start the 12th grade in the Fall. Honda del Sol- I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all Honda Civic- I have just graduated and have no credit Honda Accord- I lack any originality and am basically a lemming. Infiniti Q45- I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending. Isuzu Impulse- I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports. Jaguar XJ6- I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year. Kia Sephia- I learned nothing from the failure of Diahatsu Corp. Lincoln Town Car- I live for bingo and covered dish suppers Mercury Grand Marquis- (See above) Mercedes 500SL- I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph. Mercedes 560SEL- I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole. Mazda Miata- I do not fear being decapitated by an 18-wheeler MGB- I am dating a mechanic Mitsubishi Diamante- I don't know what it means either Nissan 300ZX- I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings. Oldsmobile Cutlass- I just stole this car and I'm going to make a.... Peugeot 505 Diesel- I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List Plymouth Neon- I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena Pontiac Trans AM- I have a switchblade in my sock Porsche 944- I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me Rolls Royce Silver Shadow- I think Pat Buchannon is a tad bit too liberal Saturn SC2- (See Honda Civic) Subaru Legacy- I have always wanted a Japanese car even more Toyota Camry- I am still in the closet Volkswagon Beetle- I still watch Partridge Family reruns Volkswagon Cabriolet- I am out of the closet Volkswagon Microbus- I am tripping right now Volvo 740 Wagon- I am frightened of my wife