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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Tomato who wrote (10685)	7/18/1999 7:46:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Respond to of 62549

"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ HUSBAND: Shall we try a different position tonight? WIFE: That's a good idea. YOU stand by the ironing board & I'LL sit on the sofa and fart. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar. Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells, "ATTENTION ALL" and farts loudly. The wife is extremely embarrassed, and the husband looks at the drunk and says" Excuse me, you just farted before my wife." The drunks replies," I'm sorry I didn't know it was her turn."