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Microcap & Penny Stocks : ABFG - AMERICAN BENEFITS GROUP, INC. -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: john who wrote (4091)	7/15/1999 1:57:00 AM
From: Jeffrey S. Mitchell	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 4128

Later today ABFG goes to court to fight the SEC and NASDAQ. I think the conversation will go something like this: ABFG: You honor, it's not fair we had to file first before everyone else. Judge: Why did you have to file first? ABFG: Because we begin with "AB" and they went alphabetically. Judge: So you want me to rule that going in alphabetical order is unconstitutional? ABFG: Well... ummmm... just in this one case. Judge: Oh, that's too bad. My teachers in elementary school used to make us sit alphabetically and this kid named Paulie with the same last name as me used to always sit behind me and kick my chair. I hated that guy. I hated that school. If you see him ask him how he thinks his wife was able to pay off her parking tickets if you know what I mean. Good thing for Paulie I became a judge and not a postal worker. As you were saying... ABFG: So, like, we want off these here pink sheets. Judge: What's the matter. You don't like pink? ABFG: We don't like not being to sell... I mean we don't like it not being easy for others to buy our stock. By "our" I mean in the company sense or course, not, you know, not that company personnel would be selling. Nope not us. You must have us confused with that company beginning with "AZ". LOL of course. Judge: So if you're so opposed to this on principle, why didn't you oppose the alphabetical rule back in January when it was first announced? ABFG: Because we weren't in pink sheet hell back then, duh! Judge: Do you have any legal precedent for why I should rule your, ahhh, demotion should be null and void? ABFG: OK, like, hear me out on this. Think of the OTC BB as the minor leagues to NASDAQ. Remember when Darryl Strawberry got arrested for drugs? Wait, maybe it was the second or third time... doesn't matter. Anyway, like, they sent him to rehab and to the minor leagues NOT down to Little League. Judge: But you guys were never in the big leagues... ABFG: That's exactly our point. We can't get to the big leagues from the Little League! It's not fair! Judge: So how will going back to the so-called minor league for a few more months help you get your filings done? ABFG: It frees up our valuable resources. Rather than go to trial on this our legal team could be busy organizing a call in your certs campaign and filing a few lawsuits against some people who make fun of us on chat boards. Judge: Speaking of chat boards, do you think Janice Shell really lives in Italy? ABFG: Can I interest you in a helicopter ride over Busang? - Jeff