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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: scrooge who wrote (10725)	7/16/1999 2:23:00 PM
From: scrooge	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62579

NASA and the Navajo In January 1965, while NASA was preparing for the Apollo project, astronaut field training was being performed on a barren stretch of a Navajo-Zuni Indian reservation in Arizona. The desolation there was presumed similar to the lunar terrain. One day, a Navajo elder and his son, who were herding sheep in the vicinity, came upon the space crew-in-training. The old man, who only spoke Navajo, asked a question, which his son translated. "What are those men in the big suits doing?" A member of the crew said they were practicing for their trip to the moon. At this, the old man became very animated, and through his son asked if he could send a message to the Moon with the astronauts. Recognizing a great promotional opportunity for the Agency, the NASA folks produced a tape recorder. After the old man recorded his message, the astronauts asked the son to translate. To this, the younger man politely refused. This certainly raised the suspicions of the government people, so one of the local NASA program subdirectors was tasked with uncovering this mystery. He brought the tape to a village on the reservation, where the tribe's local council was in session. The council listened to the recording, and in unison they all laughed or smiled; but they also would not translate the elder's message. Finally, NASA contacted an official government translator, who, after hearing the message, smiled and revealed that the Moon message said, "Watch out for these people; they have come to steal your land." --------------------

To: scrooge who wrote (10725)	7/17/1999 1:40:00 AM
From: appro	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62579

Drivers Explain Their Accidents The following are explanations for various automobile accidents which were taken from insurance claim forms by Tilden Ltd., Canada's foremost car rental agency. These humorous tidbits are reprinted from the Wisconsin Insuror. Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have. A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him. In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole. The gentleman behind me struck me on the backside. He then went to rest in the bush with just his rear-end showing. I told the police I was not injured, but on removing my hat I found I had a fractured skull. I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him. When I saw that I could not avoid a collision, I stepped on the gas and subsequently crashed into the other car. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law in the other seat and headed over the embankment. I had been driving my car for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian. I first saw the slow-moving, sad faced old gentleman when he bounced off the hood of my car. The accident happened when the right front door of a car came around the corner without giving any signal. The telephone pole was approaching fast. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end. A pedestrian I did not see, hit me, then went sliding under my car. The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him. The accident occurred when I was attempting to bring my car out of a skid by steering it into the other vehicle. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle, and vanished. I had been learning to drive with power steering. I turned the wheel to what I thought was enough and found myself in a different direction going in the opposite direction.