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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Dayuhan who wrote (11389)	9/5/1999 8:29:00 AM
From: John Carragher	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62552

An old retired sailor puts on his old uniform and goes down to the docks once more for old times sake. He finds a little prostitute and goes up into the room with her. He draped his sailor suit across the bed and going at it as best as he can for a guy his age he asks "How am I doing". Then she says, "Well, sailor, your doing about 3 Knots". "What's that?" he asks. She says, "You're Knot hard, you're Knot in. and your Knot getting your money back.

To: Dayuhan who wrote (11389)	9/5/1999 8:46:00 AM
From: c.horn	Respond to of 62552

Susan was in her late thirties and still not married. She just had a hard time meeting men. And the men she did meet all ended up being jerks. Finally, she decided to place an ad in the personals in the newspaper. She wrote: "Looking for a man who won't beat me, won't leave me, and is excellent in bed." Several days went by and she hadn't gotten a single call. Then, one day she was doing her laundry when she heard a knock on the door. She walked upstairs to answer it. She opened the door and saw a man in a wheelchair with no arms and no legs. "Can I help you?" she asked. He said, "I am the man of your dreams!" She was baffled. She said, "Excuse me." "I read your personal ad in the paper and I am the perfect man for you. I have no arms, so I can't beat you. I have no legs, so I can never leave you." "But are you good in bed?" she asked. He replied, "How do you think I knocked on the door?!"

To: Dayuhan who wrote (11389)	9/5/1999 12:41:00 PM
From: E	Respond to of 62552

It's the first day of first grade, and the teacher asks the children each to tell about a fun experience they had during the summer. She calls on Jimmy, and he says, "I took a ride on the choo choo." The teacher says, "Jimmy, you're a big boy now, and in school we learn not to use baby talk. What you should say is, 'I took a ride on the train.'" Then she calls on Joey, and he says, "My mother read me a book." The teacher asks, "Joey, what was the title of the book?" Joey replies, "Winnie the Shit."

To: Dayuhan who wrote (11389)	9/5/1999 9:20:00 PM
From: John Messbauer	Respond to of 62552

A man was celebrating his 90th birthday at a big party given by all his family. His sons, thinking it would be really fun, hired a stripper to come in and dance for their father. The stripper did her thing and stripped down to her G-string, climbed up on the old gentlemen's lap, and looked him in the eyes and said, "Would you like super sex?" He thought about it for a minute and replied, "I think I'll take the soup." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q; How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"