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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Karen Lawrence who wrote (11757)	9/29/1999 5:42:00 PM
From: John Carragher	Respond to of 62578

"Look Before You Bite" As I was trying to pack for vacation, my 3-year-old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point, she said, "Mom, look at this," and stuck out two of her fingers. Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her fingers in my mouth, pretending to eat them, before rushing out of the room again. When I returned, my daughter was standing on the bed with a devastated look on her face. "Mommy, where's my booger?" she asked. I don't think I've fully recovered from this trauma! "Too Young for a Sleepover" My husband often fell asleep on the couch while cuddling our 3-month-old son. Night after night, I would wake him up and, in a sleepy daze, he would put our son to bed. But one night, our son was already in his crib and my husband was asleep on the couch with our small dog. When I told him it was time for bed, he got up, cradling the dog, and started walking toward our son's room. Only when I asked him, "Where are you going with the dog?" did he look down at the furry face-to which he exclaimed, "You're not the baby!" I'm just thankful I caught him before he tried to put the dog in the baby's crib for the night. "Supermarket Sound Effects" My baby loves it when I make silly sounds to go along with such activities as dialing the phone or turning on the faucet. So when I went to the grocery store one day, I decided to entertain her. As I paid for my food, I made a whoosh sound while swiping my card through the ATM machine. Then, I made boop boop sounds as I keyed in my PIN number. I looked down, expecting to see my daughter's excited face-only to realize that I had come to the store by myself that day! I can only imagine what the clerk and other customers thought of the nutty woman who made sound effects as she paid for her food. "Taking Child Restraint to a New Level" After a long, exhausting day visiting relatives, I put my 3-year-old in her car seat for the trip home. She kept fussing and whining, even when I tried to console her with songs. Finally, I turned around to talk to her and discovered why she was so unhappy. I had somehow managed to put the straps of her car seat under her arms instead of over her shoulders. She couldn't put her arms down and had been that way for almost 20 minutes! I quickly unbuckled her and straightened the straps. Luckily, no damage was done, and she promptly fell asleep. "Sometimes It Pays to Listen" I was getting my 4-year-old son ready for a bath one night when he pointed and said, "Look, a snake!" Since he calls anything long and thin, even spaghetti, a snake, I replied, "That's nice," and continued with what I was doing. After he said this again, I decided to look-and discovered a sleeping boa constrictor! Our renters' pet had managed to crawl up to our bathroom. Now when my son says, "Look, a snake!" I look.