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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Flea who wrote (12646)	11/25/1999 3:56:00 PM
From: Tomato	Respond to of 62558

Modified from the book Jewish Haiku by David Bader Five thousand years A wandering people --- Then we found the cabanas In the ice sculpture Reflected bar mitzvah guests Nosh on chopped liver Shocking new finding All this worrying Really WILL give you cancer Firefly steals into the night Just like my former partner- The gonif Jewish triathlon Gin rummy, then contract bridge Followed by a nap Looking for pink buds To prune back The mohel tends his flower garden Look Muffy! I've found The most splendid tschochke For our Hanukkah bush Scrabble brouhaha After putzhead Is placed on a triple-word score BLT on toast The rabbi takes his first bite Then the lightening bolt Jewish and dyslexic I thought I was buying A Chai Pet Shatner and Nimoy Observing Shabbos “Scotty Beam up a minyan The wily red fox At temple, I spy its paws Lurking on a stole Hava nagila, hava nagila Hava nagila, hava-- Enough already? A lovely nose ring, Excuse me While I put my head in the oven SJF seeking a soul mate Must be A professional Tea ceremony, Steam, incense, lacquered bowls Try the danish Odd new disorder The Jew who mistook his wife For a yarmulke After the warm rain The sweet smell of gardenias Did you wipe your feet? The spitting image of her father Down the road Rhinoplasty, yes? After the youngest repeats the 4 questions The 5th “When do we eat, already?” Jews on safari, Map, compass, elephant gun, Hard sucking candies Wet moss on the old stone path I lay flat on my back Pondering whom to sue Today I am a man Tomorrow I return To seventh grade The sparrow brings home Too many worms for her young “Force yourself!” she chirps Left the door open For the prophet Elijah Now our cat is gone Yom Kippur--forgive me God For the Mercedes And all the lobsters “Mom please!” There is no need To put the dinner roll In your pocketbook Hard to tell under the lights White yarmulke? Or male pattern baldness? Mantra of Jewish Buddhist Monk-- They never write They never call How can I atone For scalping my tickets For the High Holidays? Heimlich. Is that a Jewish name? I wonder As a diner turns blue “Through the Red Sea Costs extra” the Israeli movers Overcharge Moses