Silicon Investor (SI) -- The First Internet Community

STOCKTALK

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor. We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community. If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: TigerPaw who wrote (12957)	1/4/2000 8:02:00 AM
From: R.E.B.	Respond to of 62550

Giant Cockroach There's this guy, we'll call him Joe, a real loner, who on the weekends camps out in his recliner with a bottle of Jack Daniels and a case of beer and a stack of rented movies. Joe gets totally wasted every weekend and drinks until he passes out. One Saturday night close to midnight Joe's door bell rang, "ding-dong." "Who kin thet beeee, BELCHHHH" Joe said as he staggard for the door. When Joe opened the door he stood face to face with a giant 6 foot cockroach. Immediately the cockroach punched Joe in the nose, then gave Joe a karate chop to the throat then kicked Joe in the knee, then ran away. "Damn, what the hell was that?" Joe said as he lay on the front porch bleading from the nose and in obvious pain. Joe managed to crawl back to the house and get to his recliner, then passed out. The next weekend Joe's a new man. "No more drinking like last weekend, I've got to maintain control of myself" Joe proclaimed. That night Joe cut back on the Jack Daniels and beer; he was drunk, but a comfortable drunk. "At least I won't be having any more hallucinations like last weekend," Joe said to himself. Near midnight Joe's door bell rang, "Ding-Dong-Ding-Dong." Joe was quick to react, "Ah-HA, now let's see what's going on here." Joe opened the door and immediately was kicked in the stomach by the giant cockroach. As Joe doubled over in pain, the cockroach slugged Joe in the back of the head sending Joe down hard to the porch. While Joe was down the giant cockroach kicked Joe in the ribs and back and then ran away. "Uhhhhhh, SOMEONE PLEEEESE HELP MEEEE," Joe cried. "Uuhhhhhh, ooooooo. DAMN.... SHIT. What the hell is going on?" Joe babbled under his breath as he crawled back into his home kicking the door close as he lay on the floor. "That's it, no more drinking for me. From now on I'm on the wagon" Joe vowed with his last bit of energy as he passed out in the middle of his living room. A week later Joe was prepared. He had his stack of rented movies, a pitcher of iced tea, a case of soda near by and a pizza fresh from the micro-wave. Joe was now on his third movie and completely sober when midnight approached. "DING-DONG." The door bell cracked to life and pierced the mono-toned conversation coming from his T.V. "Now I'm gonna get to the bottom of this," Joe vowed as he walked briskly towards the door. As soon as Joe opened the door he was kicked hard in the nuts by the giant cockroach. Joe groaned and grabed his nuts. The cockroach then boxed Joe's ears then grabbed Joe's hair and planted a knee right into Joe's face.... once, "SMACK".... twice.... "SMACK." Joe fell to the porch and the cockroach gave Joe two swift kicks and ran away. An hour later Joe woke up bleeding from the nose and in pain. "SHIT.....WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING TO ME?" Joe stumbled in and called for an ambulance to take him to the hospital. At the hospital Joe told the doctor everything that had happened to him over the past three weeks. The doctor gave Joe a complete once-over. And finally told Joe that he thinks he knows what's wrong. "What is it?" Joe asked. The doctor was quick to reply, "There's a real nasty bug going around Joe." ---------- Ha ha ha ha ha ha