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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: E who wrote (13058)1/17/2000 8:08:00 PM
From: Edwarda  Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 62549
 
Oh, E, that is marvelous! I'm going to share it all over the e-mail circuit.

One in return:

> Bran Muffins
> ------------
> This 85 year old couple, having been married almost 60 years,
> had died in a car crash. They had been in good health the last
> ten years mainly due to her interest in health food, and exercise.
> When they reached the pearly gates, St. Peter took them to their
> mansion, which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen and master
> bath suite and Jacuzzi.
>
> As they "oohed and aahed" the old man asked Peter how much all
> this was going to cost. "It's free," Peter replied, "this is Heaven."
> Next they went out back to survey the championship golf course that
> the home backed up to. They would have golfing privileges
> everyday and each week the course changed to a new one representing
> the great golf courses on earth. The old man asked, "What are the
> green fees?" Peter's reply, "This is heaven, you play for free."
> Next they went to the club house and saw the lavish buffet lunch
> with the cuisine's of the world laid out.
>
> "How much to eat?" asked the old man. "Don't you understand yet?
> This is heaven, it is free!" Peter replied with some exasperation.
> "Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol tables?" the old man asked timidly. Peter lectured, "That's the best part...you can eat
> as much as you like of whatever you like and you never get fat and
> you never get sick. This is Heaven."
>
> With that the old man went into a fit of anger, throwing down his hat and stomping on it, and shrieking wildly. Peter and his wife both
> tried to calm him down, asking him what was wrong. The old man
> looked at his wife and said, "This is all your fault. If it
> weren't for your bran muffins, I could have been here ten years ago!"