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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: The Philosopher who wrote (13210)	1/26/2000 1:50:00 PM
From: Calvin Scott	Respond to of 62562

IT'S A GIRL THANG! Everyday I give thanks to the Goddess I have two mounds upon my bodice I shave my legs, I sit down to pee Can justify any shopping spree. Don't go to a barber, but a beauty salon Can get a massage without a hard-on I can balance the checkbook, can pump my own gas Can talk to my friends about the size of my ass. My beauty's a masterpiece, and yes, it takes long. At least I can admit to others when I'm wrong. I don't drive in circles at any cost, And I don't have a problem admitting I'm lost. I never forget an important date You just gotta deal with it, I'm usually late I don't watch movies with lots of gore Don't need instant replay to remember the score. I won't lose my hair, I don't get jock itch, And just cause I'm assertive, Don't call me a bitch. Don't say to your friends, Oh yeah, I can get her In your dreams, my dear, I can do better! Flowers are okay, But jewelry's best. Would you look at my face, Not at my chest! I don't have a problem Expressing my feelings I know when you're lying, You look at the ceiling. Don't call me a girl, A babe or a chick. I am a WOMAN, Get it, you prick?!