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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: greenspirit who wrote (76344)	3/27/2000 3:43:00 PM
From: Neocon	Respond to of 108807

That is what I thought, that I usually tried to take it down a notch without getting into yet another argument over tact, which, when I first started on SI, arose all the time........

To: greenspirit who wrote (76344)	3/27/2000 3:43:00 PM
From: epicure	Respond to of 108807

Hardly encouraged Michael- I hope only you could come away with THAT interpretation of the events. What I said to Steven says everything I have to say about the issue. I thought I should comment even though I don't like you, because I thought what Lorrie said was a slur on you, but it was unclear, and muddled and I really couldn't tell for sure WHAT she was saying. The water's were muddy before I entered the discussion, or whatever it was- what I beleive is fairly clear, and everyone I care about knows exactly where I stand.

To: greenspirit who wrote (76344)	3/27/2000 3:55:00 PM
From: Rambi	Read Replies (5) \| Respond to of 108807

Since I always try to be fair and open minded, after I searched Ammo's room for evidence of explosives or a black trenchcoat, I went looking for any studies that could take us away from the insults to some facts regarding infant care. this one seemed relevant: Father Involvement Decreases Violence and Abuse Current research reveals a dramatic finding regarding the relationship between father-infant care and subsequent sexual abuse of children. Hilda and Seymour Parker of the University of Utah did a comparative study of 56 men who were known to have sexually abuse their daughters and 54 men who had no known child sexual abuse in their backgrounds. There was a significant correlation between the lack of involvement in child care and nurturance and child abuse. Overall, stepfathers abuse children at a considerably higher rate than natural fathers. However, when comparing stepfathers who have been involved in nurturing their stepdaughters during the first three years of life with natural fathers who were similarly involved, we find no significant difference in sexual abuse rates. The higher rate of stepfathers' sexual abuse of daughters appeared related to their higher rate of absence and lack of opportunity to nurture during the critical reciprocity of the early years. It is safe to conclude that a man's involvement in the physical care of a child prior to the age of three, whether the child is his own or someone else's, significantly reduces the probability that that man will be involved later in the sexual abuse of any child. It is clear that humanization of both fathering and of the child, which is inherent in daily physical care of the child, erects a strong barrier against later exploitation of parent-child intimacy. (Child Development: The Difference a Dad Makes Kyle Pruett, M.D.)