To: Barney who wrote (14242 ) 5/7/2000 11:47:00 AM From: Edwarda Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 62562
Cards You'll Never Find at Hallmark > >Congratulations on your wedding day. Too bad no one likes your wife. > >How could two people as beautiful as you have such an ugly baby. > >I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. After >having met you, I've changed my mind. > >I must admit, you brought religion in my life. I never believed in Hell >until I met you. > >Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but >wonder, what was I thinking? > >When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've >broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise. > >As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am that you're not here to ruin >it for me. > >If I get only one thing for Christmas, I hope it's your sister. > >As you grow older, Mum, I think of all the gifts you've given me..... >like the need for therapy. > >Thanks for being a part of my life. I never knew what evil was before >this. > >Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go, would you like to take >this knife out of my back? You'll probably need it again. > >Someday I hope to get married, but not to you. > > >Happy birthday. You look great for your age....Almost lifelike. > >I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend. So >here's his leash, water bowl and chew toys. > >We have been friends for a very long time, what say we call it quits. > >I'm so miserable without you, it's almost like you were here. > >Congratulations on your new bundle of joy. Did you ever find out who the >father was? > >You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship and there >was only one life jacket, I'd miss you heaps and think of you often. > >Happy birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Arkansas)