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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: arno who wrote (14359)	5/9/2000 5:35:00 PM
From: Mike 2.0	Respond to of 62554

Signs that will indicate the tech bear market is over: * Business Week publishes cover story of giant, vicious bear with huge claws destroying Silicon Valley buildings King-Kong style, with the title "Is tech dead?" In fact, the cover comes with 3-D glasses! * James Cramer issues a dispatch on thestreet.com, announcing he has sold all technology stocks and is long KREM to the max, proclaiming it a winner of the new "Main Street" economy of the new millenium. "Screw token rings...we want doughnuts!" * KREM options are offered, and some bright bulb posts that he is selling naked puts. * Politicians get into the act, deciding that, hey, maybe we DO want to make potato chips instead of computer chips! * Reruns of PBS special featuring 80's investing messiah Peter Lynch's style of investment research re-appear, specifically, the one where Peter Lynch and the host are munching on a Cinnabon(tm) in the mall and Peter says something like "Yum, this tastes better than technology, huh?" * Venture capital pours into food manufacturing, lead by a new outfit called Consolidated Goodfood Inc., or CMmmmmmGI for short. * Regulars on the SI Value Investing thread actually wonder aloud whether maybe they should buy tech stocks. * People think you mean "Sysco" when you say "Cisco is a stock you've just gotta own"

To: arno who wrote (14359)	5/10/2000 12:44:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Respond to of 62554

A guy and a girl met at a bar ... They're getting along so well that they decide to go to the girl's place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and washes his hands ... He then takes off his pants and washes his hands. So the girl looks at him and says: "You must be a dentist!" The guy all surprised says "Yes .. how did you figure that out?" The girl says: "Easy...You keep washing your hands." One thing led to another. They make love. After they were done, the girl says: "You must be a GREAT dentist!" The guy was very very surprised, he says: 'Yes, I sure am a great dentist; how did you figure that out??' The girl says: "Easy.. I didn't feel a thing."