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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (14398)	5/10/2000 1:57:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Respond to of 62550

The wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and says, "Honey, do you remember this?" He looks up at her and replies, "Yes dear, I do, you wore that same negligee the night we were married." "That's right." she replied, "And do you remember what you said to me that night?" He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember." "Well, what was it?" He responds, "Well honey, as I remember, I said, "Ohhhhhhh, Baby, I'm going to suck the life out of those big tits and screw your brains out!" She giggles and says, "Yes, That was it. That was exactly what you said. And now it's 50 years later, I'm in the same negligee I wore that night. What do you have to say tonight?" Again, he looks up at her and looks her up and down and says, "Mission Accomplished."

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (14398)	5/10/2000 1:58:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Respond to of 62550

Stuck in a strange city by bad weather, the drinker was bored. He sat in the bar and looking to strike up a conversation, turned to bartender and said, "Hey, about those Democrats in the Congress . . " "Stop -- I don't permit talk about politics in my bar!" interrupted the bartender. A few minutes later the gent tried again, "People say about the Pope ... " "No religion talk either," the bartender cut in. "Look, how about sex. Can I talk sex?" "Sure." "Then f**k you."

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (14398)	5/10/2000 2:02:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Respond to of 62550

Dan married one of a pair of identical twin girls. Less than a year later, he was in court filing for a divorce. "OK," the judge said, "Tell the court why you want a divorce." "Well, your honor," Dan started, "Every once in a while my sister in law would come over for a visit, and because she and my wife are identical in appearance, every once in a while I'd end up making love to her by mistake." "Surely there must be some difference between the two women," the judge said. "You'd better believe there is a difference, your honor. That's why I want the divorce," he replied.

To: SIer formerly known as Joe B. who wrote (14398)	5/10/2000 2:04:00 PM
From: Edwarda	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62550

A guy was sitting in a bar. He was throwing money around, giving the bartender hundred pound tips and buying drinks for everyone. He was surrounded by a crowd of adoring women. The bartender liked the tips, but he was kind of curious about a little man that would jump from the rich guy's pocket now and then. The little man would run up and down the bar, kicking over the bowls of peanuts and flipping people the bird. Then the little guy would jump back into the rich guy's jacket for a while. The bartender went over and asked the guy what was up. The rich guy says, "Well, let me tell you a little story. I was walking along a beach one day, and I come across this lamp. I picked it up, rubbed on it to clean it, and 'POW!' a genie pops out. I get three wishes, so I first wish to be fabulously wealthy. Then I wish for a harem. As you can see I got both." The bartender says, "So what about that little person in your jacket?" "Oh, that," mumbles the rich guy. "My third wish was a twelve-inch prick!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~ NOW may I take a break?