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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Wooly who wrote (14863)	6/5/2000 4:12:00 PM
From: Calvin Scott	Respond to of 62552

There was a mature gentleman wandering around in a supermarket calling out at intervals, "Crisco, Cris--co!" Finally a store clerk approached. "Sir, the Crisco is on aisle five." "Oh," replied the old gentleman, "I'm not looking for cooking Crisco, I am calling my wife." "Your wife is named "Crisco?" "Nah," he answered, "I only call her that when we come to the supermarket." "Oh? What do you call her when you are not in the supermarket?" "Lard ass."

To: Wooly who wrote (14863)	6/5/2000 5:11:00 PM
From: Mike 2.0	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62552

Another real story, Wooly: a person in the same building I once worked at years back, saw from the window some guy run out of a furniture store (on the ground floor of our building). He was running out the front door with an oversized leather easy chair. He was manhandling the chair, hurriedly stuffing it into the back of their vehicle, it was clear they hadn't paid for it (he had grabbed the floor model). Then they sped off...for about two blocks, then sat in traffic. I believe the cops busted them in their vehicle less than 1/2 mile away from the store. Note to would-be thieves: when you do a "grab and run," grab something you can RUN with! <g>