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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Rick Julian who wrote (84871)	8/4/2000 9:47:38 AM
From: Neocon	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 108807

Well, perhaps. But I have still not gotten a response to the post on taking things seriously and acting with care.....

To: Rick Julian who wrote (84871)	8/4/2000 9:48:41 AM
From: epicure	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 108807

When I was in college I worked my way through as a married woman. My husband worked to at a student job part time. We were both taking at least 15 units each and working part time. Rent was expensive, the job market wasn't tight like it is now- especially in a college town overflowing with workers- and my husband and I used to run out of food and money by the end of the month. We'd be stuck eating Kraft macaroni and cheese for a week. I put up with a lot of sexual harassment at the part time waitress jobs I held. My managers were always men, and they were awful. I couldn't afford to quit and blow a whole semester if I lost my apartment. It would have seriously messed up my life, and what is WORSE, it would have messed up my husband's life, because he was depending on me to do my part. Fear is sometimes rational. If you are going to lose your house, your healthcare, that is serious stuff- especially if people are in your care or are trusting you to help share a burden. I was married so young I don't remember a time when people didn't depend on me as part of a unit. But I imagine it is much easier to lose or quit your job when your action isn't affecting someone else. It is always worse (for me) to bring catastrophe on someone that I love, than to bring it on myself.

To: Rick Julian who wrote (84871)	8/4/2000 9:55:32 AM
From: Rambi	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 108807

I think Neo's point (and mine) is that these drastic, highly emotional life decisions need to be carefully considered, not carried out on a precipitous wave of the dramatic moment, and perhaps you and joan feel that yes, they really need the impetus of the moment to actually DO it- that to stop and think will immobilize one, let the fear in. This might be true (probably is), but most committed family men (or women) would NOT act without taking time to reflect and I think that's a good thing. Ideally, they could arrive at a solution that allows change with the least damage to the family. Life is such a balancing act. Especially once you have children. I think you will find a huge difference in perspective- and yes, I will be there with a lovingly prepared platter of the highest quality crow I can find. I certainly have had to eat my share. Anyway- I am sorry that it has gotten nasty and wish it would stop. Can't we go back to picking on Frederick? He doesn;t see to mind at all- he likes it. I decided this morning after reading his post to me that he is having us on. What a relief. I must leave you in darkness. I need to take my roman candle and GO and DO today. Have fun.