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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: sandintoes who wrote (16534)	10/24/2000 3:06:14 AM
From: Barney	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Subject: Fw: Clear day on the road Hillary Clinton and her driver were cruising along a country road one evening when a cow ran in front of the car. The driver tried to avoid it but couldn't - the cow was killed. Hillary told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what happened. About an hour later, the driver staggered back to the car with his clothes in disarray. He was holding a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and smiling happily. "What happened?" asked Hillary. "Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar, and their beautiful daughter made mad passionate love to me." "My God, what did you tell them?" asked Hillary. The driver replied: "I'm Hillary Clinton's driver, and I just killed the cow."

To: sandintoes who wrote (16534)	10/27/2000 5:55:31 AM
From: 2MAR$	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 62549

Two young guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court before the judge. The judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I'll see you back in court Monday." Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to the first one, "How did you do over the weekend?" "Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever." "17 people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?" "I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles like this _ / \ O \ _ / and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is your brain after drugs." "That's admirable," said the judge. "And you, how did you do?" (to the 2nd boy) "Well, your honor, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever." "156 people! That's amazing! How did you manage to do that!" "Well, I used a similar approach. (draws two circles) I said (pointing to small circle) this is your asshole before prison..... courtesy of Tom Hua: Message 14671607