Silicon Investor (SI) -- The First Internet Community

STOCKTALK

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor. We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community. If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.

Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Barney who wrote (17576)	1/5/2001 4:17:10 PM
From: Karen Lawrence	Respond to of 62549

Virus update: Several new viruses have been discovered and are wreaking havoc throughout the national system. Beware of.. THE MIKE TYSON virus... (Quits after two bytes) THE OPRAH WINFREY virus... (Your 300mb hard drive shrinks to 100mb, then slowly expands to stabilize around 200MB) THE CLINTON Virus... (Gives you a 6 Inch Hard Drive with NO memory) THE BOB DOLE (aka: VIAGRA) virus... (Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy) THE LEWINSKY virus... (Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then Emails everyone about what it did) THE RONALD REAGAN virus... (Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored) THE JACK KAVORKIAN virus... (Deletes all old files) THE ELLEN DEGENERES virus... (Disks can no longer be inserted) THE PROZAC virus... (Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care) THE JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus... (Only attacks minor files) THE LORENA BOBBITT virus... (Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows) THE ALAN GREENSPAN antivirus...(Doesn't work until files have crashed, and data has disappeared.)